"News From the Future"

I wrote this piece around the time of the British Petroleum oil leak In the Gulf of Mexico...I called it the "Future News" 

Washington D.C. May 26, 2090.…In the news today, the Al-Qaeda Daily, Arab Press and the Muslim news reported that the Arctic ocean, the last ocean to be free from the leaking oil from the Gulf of Mexico is now totally polluted…officially, the U.S. White House reports and confirms that all oceans are now thick with oil the consistency of pudding. The President was at a fund raiser yesterday seeking donations for his reelection but as an afterthought confirmed that there is no more sea life living in any ocean. A committee is being formed to oversee the existing committee on discussing a bail out program for British Petroleum. …British Petroleum said today they are still working hard to cap the leak in the gulf by putting sand on top of the hole but reports it’s a time consuming job. Meanwhile the last of the Whales and Sea Turtles are putting themselves on shore preferring to suffocate on land rather the in the ocean. When asked about the scarcity of drinking water in the United States the president said, the government will provide bottled water on the third Wednesday of every month. Limit is two 12 once bottles per family of four. Non-citizens will receive six 12 ounce bottles. When ask why that is…The president replied, because we need to be nice to our foreign friends. They showed great courage crossing the border in all that gunfire. In other news the Senate just voted a unanimous yes to appropriate from American taxpayers, the money to build a Western White House in Dubai.
In other news…. The committee overseeing the committee seeking to elect Mohammed Abdul Mohammed Jr. President of the United States is seeking funds from the United Arab Emirates and Dubai. Dubai, the capital of the Mid-east recently completed building an artificial ocean with profits from raising gas prices in the United States $291.99 per gallon.…. If elected he will be the fifth President to admit being a Muslim of the highest order.. When asked, He said he will, “Use American Tax dollars to build a Mosque in every Federal building in the United States. “And that’s a campaign promise”, he was heard saying in Arabic to his press secretary. He later commented that the new law concerning woman will go into effect on June 1^st making it mandatory that all woman must wear their full robes or suffer the consequences of being stoned on the city street by the Jihad police…And that’s the News for today, May 26, 2090...Stay tuned…

"President For a Few Days" Part Two

                This is part two of a three part series on how to fix the American Economy..


No Lawyers of any kind will be allowed to run for any Federal or State office for the next 10 years. There will be no postponements or delays of any kind for any trial. Reduce the health benefits to all federal employees. Cancel all health benefits to Congressmen and Senators with more than 4 years of service. Make it mandatory that Congress and the Senate pay for their own Health Insurance. Cancel pensions to the same unless they have 20 years service and are 62 years old. There are no exceptions. From this moment on a 25% pay reduction to all Federal employees. No exceptions. All Federal aid to States will be stopped for Welfare or food stamps and only people who have been citizens of this country for 10 years will be eligible for Welfare and food stamps. No exceptions. There will be no Federal or State bail outs of any type for anyone. No exceptions. From this moment the Treasury Dept. will stop the printing of U.S. currency for 5 years. Reduce the Federal work force by 30% over the next year. No exceptions. Reduce the Federal car pool by 75% over the next year...All contracts to build special motor vehicles or aircraft is cancelled. Reduce the Pentagon staff by 50% over the next year. Reduce Military spending by 50% over the next 6 months ...There will be No more Private Jet flights for any reason. No exceptions. All and any air fare to anywhere will be paid for by the person making the flight. No exceptions. No reimbursements for Federal employees for any reasons. All government credit cards will turned in and destroyed. All multi millionaires with over 3 million dollars will pay a 50% tax on all assets. Billionaires are not exempt they will pay a 75% tax on all assets. All oil imported from anywhere will be stopped. All oil companies with wells within 1500 miles of the U.S. mainland will reduce the price of the barrel of oil by 75% or be shut down. No exceptions. All oil from Alaska will be shipped to the mainland United States. No Exceptions. A 200% import tax will be levied on all imports from China or anywhere else. No exceptions. Any environmental damage due to oil spills or for any reason will be paid for in full by the oil company with a 100% penalty tax. No exceptions. Anyone found responsible for environmental damage will be arrested for Terrorism and executed if found guilty. That includes the CEO’s and mid level management of all oil companies. All suspected Terrorists that enter this country to cause harm to any American will be shot immediately. Any bonuses paid to anyone with Federal or tax dollars constitutes fraud and they will be prosecuted to full extent of the law. No foreign cars will be allowed to be imported into the U.S. No exceptions. No American cars will exported. All American Drug companies will reduce the price of all medication by 95%. The retirement age for Seniors will be returned to 62 with a full Government Social Security pension. 


                                 Tune in tomorrow for part three of a three part series..

"Diversity"

There are the people that think reality TV is real. There are the Millionaires that live on one side of town and the criminals that live on the other side. We have 20 year olds who live in a bubble and write their memoir because they have a famous Mom. Huh! Now if that’s not about the money what is? We have the people that think they live in a free country. Forgetting that every move they make is watched and scrutinized by God only knows who. Remember that, the next time you are X-rayed at an airport and they look at your private parts. More odd than that is, you accept it and let them do it. That in its self is terrorism. Never mind when they run their hands up your legs and buttocks. I always wonder what kind of a person looks at crotches for a living. If someone did that to you on the street they would be arrested for assault. Next we have the victims and the crooks. More crooks though and its getting worse. We have the people that believe the TV commercials and max out their credit cards buying all that junk. We have the decent Politicians. Huh, Where? Just a minute I’m looking! And then we have the corrupt. There aren’t many honest ones but its hard to tell the difference. I keep thinking of Charlie Rangel and that slime that had the money in the freezer. There are the drug addicts that think they are special. Then you have the dead drug addict pedophile who died thinking he was better than you because he could hire a Doctor drug dealer to shoot him up. Of coarse there are the drug addicts that are out of control and will kill you for material things. There is Charlie Sheen who criticizes the AA Big Book. Ask the millions of sober Alcoholics about that one. At this point in his life I think Charlie thinks he is better than God. I feel bad for his father and brothers. I don’t know who his Mom is but I feel sorry for her too. Then we have the radical Muslims and the regular Muslims. They have 2 Gods. One is the killer who kills children. The other isn’t. Its hard to tell the difference. You never know which one will walk into grocery store and blow it up to kill everyone. We have the Christians, they are all the same. They are pretty safe. We have a lot of black people and white people. Some good but there are mostly black people in the prisons. I wonder why that is? We have Illegal and legal aliens. Most are honest but some spoil it for all the others and steal from the welfare system. It hurts everyone when they do that. They don’t seem to care and laugh at you when you pay for their groceries and can’t buy gas for your car to be able to go to work to pay taxes to buy their grocery’s. We have our own oil wells in this country but we send it to other countries. We buy oil from the countries that hate Americans and kill our soldiers that try to protect them. There are the people that sue the State and the Government. Who they are suing is the people of this country. We pay for the Lawyers and they are suing us for tax dollars. Connecticut has a State Income Tax. It was supposed to be temporary. That was 20 years ago. They allowed the Indians to build Casinos so tax dollars could pay for education in Connecticut. Now they are closing schools and cutting school programs. The result is dying communities around the Casinos and schools filled with the children of casino workers and Illegal children. Now they want to tax the coupons that save you a dollar. Its Insane…There is more but I’ll save it for another day.. In the mean time take some time for Cecelia..Great song